Introspection

It has been a while since I wrote on here because I was allowing other people to influence me and my life. Again. These past several months have been a bit of a struggle without me even really realizing it, but I am chuggin’ along and making progress. I am beyond thankful for my tribe of wonderful people who are also pains in the asses that challenge me and ask me how I am (how dare they, right??). Yea,  yea. I needed it (still need it sometimes). It helps that they are mostly therapists who don’t let me get away with anything.

If nothing else, the past few months have taught me to be more self aware. In this self awareness, I found that I still have a lot of shit to work on.  Which is okay. I found that I need to be more intentional in my every day life. Which is hard. I found that I still self sabotage even when I am feeling good about where I am. Maegan, knock it off.

So I am writing my plan down in order to better hold myself accountable.

  1. Apply to the FBI- done. Back up plan: graduate school, medical school, lol what do I want to do?? Figure this out, please and thank you.
  2. Read more, write more, watch and listen to things with more substance, be an active member of this world, stop being ignorant and formulate well thought out opinions on what the heck is happening around you.
  3. Be more intentional with friendships- make more of an effort to talk to people you want in your life, don’t stress over people who don’t want to reciprocate the effort, stop making excuses and make plans and then freaking follow through with them.
  4. Be HEALTHY
    1. lol, no really
    2. No alcohol
    3. Reduce snacking/sweets- actually practice moderation
    4. Exercise at least 4 times per week
    5. Healthier eating habits in general
    6. Drink more water
    7. Sleep more-first figure out how to do this with doggos who don’t like to sleep
    8. STRETCH gosh dangit
    9. Meet your fitness goals in the next 6 months
  5. Stop consistently putting others ahead of yourself- my self awareness tells me that this has been my number one downfall  and what has gotten me into trouble time and time again.
  6. Practice saying no. Practice saying I don’t like that. Practice saying I am not okay with this.
  7. MONEY MANAGEMENT- ya girl is broke and has a lot of things she wants to do, get it together and figure out a way to make these things actually a possibility
  8. Stop letting things slide- be a little more confrontational with others, yourself, and your difficulties. Your opinion matters. Your well being matters. Your happiness matters. Be a strong, independent, bold woman who don’t take no shit.
  9. Stop caring about what other people think, stop being easily embarrassed, be you and have fun. Probably tell your parents about your tattoos.
  10. Take better care of the dogs, you will benefit from it too.

Setting goals is easy peasy, following through on the work it takes to achieve them is a whole other ball game. I am ready for hard work, failures, and probably a lot of self doubt and tears to push through. Bring it.

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